Why do black guys like blonde white girls so much? | IGN Boards
Almost all assume that white women are choosing black men, but black when they see beautiful blonde-haired blue-eyed white women dating black men? . If white men almost never see black women, it's less likely they'll start dating them. Rudo is a black woman who has never been attracted to black men. She's always dated white men and eventually married one. She says she. There she was: a blond woman with big blue eyes, hair cornrowed tight, We know that the number of black men who date white women far.
Whereas many westernised women, white women, may feel that marrying an Asian man or a Latino man, that they will have a more patriarchal approach and be less supportive of their more feminist type of culture.
Anyone relate to any of that?? I find like there's a huge difference in how Caucasian men treat women. So just for example, when I, my English ex cooked me dinner, he would cook me dinner like from the start to finish and even like help cleaning the dishes and even like pamper me and do everything for me.
But my Indonesian ex would just expect me to cook dinner and then let me do the dishes and then he'll just like play games on the internet. That's the idea of having like a romantic dinner. Okay, I think we've got to be very careful not to stereotype here.
You know we're talking about people's individual experiences. Why do you have Race specific events? We program our events based on preference.
So popularity, if enough people suggest a certain type of event, that's an event that we'll put on. If it's popular or successful and when I say successful we talk about a higher match rate, then it's an event we keep on running. So what are the most popular events? One of our really popular events is Asian women speed dating. It has a very high match rate so we ran an event last night that had percent match rate, meaning that every person who came met at least one person that they matched with.
Let's have a look. Ladies if you can please spread yourselves around the room at one of the tables and we'll get going.
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Nothing against the blonde haired, blue eyed girls but Asian ladies definitely look after the partner, yeah, and very easy to get along with. I'm looking for a good man. It doesn't matter where he comes from MAN 3: I guess Asian women might be a little more open to try new things.
Just things out of the ordinary, I guess, like hobbies like car racing, and stuff like that.
If I want to get married to someone, I don't want to only marry them for their good looks only. If we have nothing in common, it's going to be like flat line. Asian girls like a guy that doesn't flirt with everybody but they just find the one they like and settle down rather than Caucasian, which tend to be a little bit more player-like. I guess that's - yeah, I think that's the stigma. Do you speak Italian? Marianna, it brought a big laugh here, why?
It was just the car racing, he was open to try new things like car racing. It wasn't what I was thinking. No, I don't think it was what anyone here was thinking really, but what did everybody make of that? I mean of that whole idea, I mean it's a popular event for Shaun. It clearly perpetuates those stereotypes that we were talking about, about Asian women being maybe sometimes a bit more docile or that they are supposedly, you know, well I think our friend here said more attentive to the man and will be at the man's beck and call rather than somebody that's more assertive.
I think it's a stereotype. I've got Asian friends, I don't think that they're necessarily all like that - I think it's a personality issue.
John, do you think it's a stereotype? To an extent it is, but as far as Asian women being docile, I'm sorry to disappoint you, they're not docile, they're not docile. Okay, I wonder, Juliana, have you met men who you feel like you just because you're Asian in that sense, have you had that experience? Totally, yeah, I think for like Europeans, they're so crazy about Asian women, like they have this thing called yellow fever, I think everyone knows that.
We heard that term a lot in research that showed, yeah, we heard about other types of fever too I have to say, a lot of fever going down. Shaun, I mean when you say that an event is focused on Asian women, do you find men are looking for predominantly a particular nationality? Is there one nationality that's more popular than others? No, no, I don't think there is. I think people have an internal check list, if you like, and so race specific events such as Asian women or such as European men, which is another event that we do, people come into that with one thing already ticked off their list.
So the eight minutes that you have with each person then perhaps you can focus on other things which perhaps might be why there's such a high match rate, as opposed to some broader events that we put on. Where isn't there a demand? We haven't been approached about Asian men events, we haven't been approached about European women events. Katherine, you provide a match making service too. Who are the majority of your clients and what they are looking for? So what's the bulk of that business, does any one particular cross cultural pairing stand out?
For example Caucasian looking for Asian ladies or vice versa. Okay, but what do those men say they're looking for? To me, I'm professional match maker for 25 years, I have interviewed about more than 20, individuals, so majority of the Caucasian men came to me, the physical attraction is coming first.
Then they develop the interest into the personality. So what is it about the physical attraction, do they say what it is?
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Yes, majority, majority of Asian woman appeal to be petite and they particularly like the petite type figure or physical attributes, if you call, and the dark complexion and hair and the way they present themselves. They take a pride in their looks. Apart from the physical attraction they think Asian women are friendly, they're more approachable, they're gentle, they attracted to their mentality, attitude, outlook on life, and they're appearing to be more family orientate in lots of ways.
And what, so that's what the men are looking for. What are the women looking for? Women, blue eyes, blond hair, strong, tall body so there's lots of Asian women are attracted, physically attracted to the Caucasian men. And your husband is sitting right there beside you?
That's why I fall in love with him. I say you're so lucky, you have a full set of beautiful hair, that's what I fall in love with. And are there any groups that you don't deal with or won't deal with in your business? Yes, lots of Caucasian men want very young age of Asian ladies.
So one guy particularly, it's very funny, so he's 68 or something, he wants someone I said tell me why you think this lady would like to go on date with you. He says someone else can do it.
I don't know if I should mention the name, someone famous, right? The Australian media guru married a very, very, very, very young woman lady. Whose initials might be RM perhaps?
Anyway, he said if he can do it, why can't I? I says if you have what he has, I can give you what you want. So he said well, you can't help me so I said obviously. So for the people they don't look themselves at reality, so I don't take them on. Okay, and what about if people come to you and they say that they want something in a person that you find distasteful, how do you deal with that?
I hardly come across someone really, really bad. But I'm here to help genuine singles, Australian and Asian singles, find their true love. So I'm sure they get the message. Jennifer, I know that you've looked at preferences with on-line dating does race come into that and if it does, what's the hierarchy? Yes, well we find that race is actually a primary deciding factor. We find that when people send an initial message to another dater, homophily is what social scientists call the trend and that is people tend to contact people who look just like themselves in terms of race.
So that is the most common. White daters contact white daters, it's true across sexual preference as well. But when people have the opportunity to respond to groups of people who have contacted them, what we find is that there is a racial hierarchy. So men of all races are about equally likely to respond to women, Asian women, Latino women, I'm talking about heterosexuals right now, and white women.
However, unfortunately, there tends to be less of response rates to African American daters who contact them. So African American women seem to be very marginalised on the on-line dating market. With women it's very interesting. So women tend to respond first and foremost only to white men and this is true regardless of race, of the woman's racial identity.
So white women respond primarily to white men and we also find that African American women, Asian women and Latino women also respond primarily to white men first. Okay, so is there any explanation, do you have an explanation for why that hierarchy is as you describe it in America?
We can speculate that men, male daters tend to be more racially open generally, but what I do have to say, however, there are more men than are there women on these websites and men are much more likely to send messages and to respond to messages than women are.
So some have argued, well it's not necessarily that men are more racially open, it's that they have less of a market to interact with.
What about gays then in terms of their preferences and their choices because there's a smaller pool to start with in terms of, in terms of choice? Yeah, that's exactly right and because the US census just started collecting information on gay and lesbian cohabitation, and it looks like gays and lesbians have higher rates of interracial unions and the argument is that okay, is it that gays and lesbians have more, are more racially open than straights?
Or is it exactly as you just said, a thinner dating market, you know, less of a choice. We find again a very gendered effect. The effect is more about gender than sexual identity. Lesbians look very similar to white men in their racial preferences. That is being more open racially, whereas gay men look much more similar to straight women, being less open to racial groups. Sen, I wonder what you think about hearing that, you've got a Tamil background.
Does that sit with your experience. Do you find you have preferences for certain specific groups? Well certainly when I was growing up I used to kind of dream of the prince charming, the knight in shining white armour, you know, where effectively, you know you've got these kind of representations and so your fantasy of, you know, the perfect guy is white in your head.
Now it's changed, I've had a kind of a broad dating history now which we won't get into. But certainly, but certainly, you know, growing up I've managed to kind of confront that and kind of mix it up a little bit. Mike, what did you want to say?
I just wanted to basically say that the reason that a lot of black women in the US are actually dating out now is because of the demographics. Within the black community, there's a lot of cultural enforcement for a term called "nothing but a black man".
You want to basically marry a black guy and basically within, stay within your community. However, you've got to the point now in the United States that if every single black man and every single black woman that were available met up together and got partnered, there'd be 1.
Okay, okay, over here, yes? Hi, I just wanted to comment on that. I think my preference is for black men and that's simply because I don't want to be someone's fantasy or fetish and I think for a lot of black women the main thing is when men come up to you, they're dating you solely because you're black.
But you want someone who dates you because they like who you are. I think I'll disagree with that because that's also another stereotype, because you're saying a black man's going to date you because you're also black. My husband had absolutely no preference for black women, he just wanted someone that he connected with and we met and we got on and we got married.
My question is then are you not stereotyping Caucasian men by saying that you only date Caucasian men because they're less, less patriarchal than African men? Is that not a stereotype as well? Not my only reason for dating Caucasian men. It's just a question. You know, we live in a society full of choice, why does somebody like dark chocolate instead of white chocolate? Why does someone like milk chocolate instead of peppermint chocolate? You know, I'm very proud to be black because I think there is this stereotype, but if you prefer to date outside of your race, you've got self-loathing, you've got self-hatred issues.
I don't, I'm very proud to be black, I'm proud of my African heritage. I just like what I like and that's all there is to it. I don't think I have to justify my choices to anyone. I just, I'm more attracted to Caucasian men. Anyone else, yes Ida? I was going to say you're right, you don't have to justify your choices, but I think that's one of the things that if you're about to go into an interracial relationship, you have to consider because society does judge you.
They judge the motives behind the two people that happen to be in love. Why are they together in the first place? Is it because someone's trying to get immigration papers or is it because someone's trying to, you know, sort of move up in society in terms of their social standings or whatever? Based on stereotypes of course. Yeah, definitely, because you've got to look at the cultural factors when you get married. I mean some people would say western culture is more individualistic.
Where I'm from it's not, it's very family orientated. I'm not against interracial dating. I am saying though if it is based on a fantasy or an idea of okay, Asian women are more docile or African women, you know, I read this book or whatever, then it's a no because you're trying to fulfil your fantasy.
You're not looking for a life partner so that's a big difference. It all started in a region where the prejudice grew deeper than the roots of the Mangrove trees, the porches gleamed whiter than a Romney family gathering and like around where critically acclaimed True Detective starring Matthew Mconnyhueylewy?
The sexually sadistic and voyeuristic white cis men who ran the Mandatory Cotton Camps of the South, one day, like got it into their heads that they would totally get off on seeing their blacks, yes they were their blacks, cuz they were property under the law back then, so they were seen as nothing more than a toasters or bathtubsdoing it with their wives. They forced their wives to go down to the Slave houses in the balmy summer nights and then they forced their Black men to get to work on picking their wives cotton.
These Ku-Kold-Klan kinda guys, thoroughly enjoyed seeing women of the darker shades suffer so much that they vowed to create a system by which they could systematically keep women of black color from happiness and dating their own men for centuries to come.
He was infamous for forcing black men to fornicate with white Harpy women while he watched and then accusing the black men of having used voodoo magic upon them to seduce them. He was a lawyer, so he went on to mockingly sentence them to death without any Leeway. Fynchyism is still live and well in society today, but has attached itself to the Patriarchy and become just another tool of oppression.
The Patriarchy is still doing everything it can to keep black women from being with black men.
The models who represent beauty are almost exclusively white, both male and female. White men and women are seen as what is desirable, what to emulate. Black women in particular suffer the effects of failing to meet these ridiculous standards. They are told their skin is too dark, their hair too kinky, their mouths too full. Racist stereotypes of black women being brash and loud — diametrically opposed to the stereotypes of white women — further serve to paint them as less attractive and desirable.
University of Texas sociology doctoral candidate Shantel Buggs explains the phenomenon: Asian men today are often depicted as less masculine and less desirable than white men. This originated in the mids, when there was a large influx of Chinese immigrants. Years of crass jokes about Asian men and tasteless pop culture portrayals of them have followed. The opposite side of the spectrum is just as bad.