The Real Truth About Why Some Men Run Hot And Cold
Why women sometimes treat you hot and sometimes cold? Are you feeling curious . Why she seemingly liked you, but dating with other guys? However, there's. (Click here to take the quiz “Am I Dating a Commitment Friendly Man?”) . And if your man is running hot and cold, or if you have dated a few men that .. guy for 2 months & since yesterday, he started to treat me a bit coldy. So you're here because you want to know why guys run hot and cold. you right now,” when you just started dating, he doesn't really mean what he's saying.
Relationship hiccups occur because your partner is emotionally invested, but scared. There's open communication about their fear.
Once stated, the hot phase normally reboots and continues with forward movement. A hot and cold player reverts to cold as the norm, with bursts of hot that don't result in forward movement.
Why Men Go Hot and Cold & 5 Things You Need to Do…
The root cause of this behavior is a desperate attempt to gain control over the uncontrollable; love. It's a way to feel love without getting hurt. But the partner, who's committed to playing safe, will never allow himself or herself to experience love. They'll toy at it, dipping their toes in and out of the water without ever getting wet. The cycles of hot and cold may make you feel like the powerless one. It appears as though as though your partner has all the strength.
But it's just the opposite -- real power is the ability to maintain intimacy. Power and strength of this caliber have no fear of being honest and direct. Games are an ego default when being "real" feels too scary.Hot And Cold Therapy
Authenticity takes tremendous courage. Being open and honest is a gift that's born of inner confidence and self-worth. Here's where the tables turn in your favor. Once you recognize this pattern, you've already gained your freedom from the automatic response instigated by your partner's game.
There's nothing to lose. Authentic communication reveals your partner's fears, allowing their concerns to be voiced and worked out while maintaining connection. Does your questioning meet hostility, defensiveness or resistance? If so, you've gained valuable information. This is a partner who's in the game for an ego boost and doesn't possess the skill set required for a relationship with you.
Cut your losses and walk away. Your time's better spent with someone who is capable of honesty, intimacy, and consistent behavior. After questioning, does your partner react with concern or guilt? Do they reveal their inner conflict? If so, then you may have stumbled upon a highly sensitive and fearful individual.
Evaluate your partner carefully. Get addicted to golf. Go to war for seemingly unwarranted reasons at least to a woman anyway.
Not call for several days. My point is that if your man is pulling away from the relationship, he is pulling away so that he can feel like a man. What he does may be selfish, it may hurt you like hell, and you may not LIKE it — but at the bottom of it all, he wants to feel like a man. All the better if YOU happen to be that feminine woman who makes him feel like a man. Click here to find out right now… What to do if he has come on strong and is now going hot and cold: So if right now your man seems to be running hot and cold and pulling away, and you feel scared, taken for granted or confused, here is an action step you can take: Men have evolved over millions of years to be HUNTERS — to bring home food, to kill beasts, and to work in a group with their comrades to achieve a result — ie: Men are not originally made to be in a long-term relationship with you we were made to procreate, have sex and pass our genes in to tomorrow.
But of course, humans have evolved far more than other mammals, so we are now capable of having long-term relationships. Of course he can.
The Dating Game of Hot and Cold | HuffPost
He needs it to re-charge and to feel like a man again. Give him the space and time he needs. This is going to begin the process of getting him to associate you with the feeling of being able to be feel like a man.
Do it right now. Get out a piece of paper and write down every single thing you are afraid of. Are you afraid of not being good enough for him? Are you afraid he is going to go back to his ex? Write down everything you fear write each fear beneath the other so you have space for the next part of the exercise. Now, next to each fear you have listed — write down a new meaning for that fear. Your new meaning could be my new meaning would be: Even if a man rejects my love, I have infinite love inside of me.
And even when I do feel rejected, I can still love, because I am a feminine woman who is full of love. Your new meaning would be, instead of: I know that even if he does the thing I fear the most — which is leave me — I am far too powerful a woman to diminish myself because of this. And from this day on, EVERY time you feel the fears coming up again, abruptly break your emotional pattern your recurrent fearsand go back to your list and read over your new meaning.
Then, one day, I said to myself, "Screw this. And that was the end of the hot and cold guy. Dating someone who is hot and cold just makes you feel bad about yourself. That is all it does. When the person is hot, you are on top of the world, only to be pulled down with hurricane-force winds when he or she decides to be cold again.
So, why do people choose to be hot and cold in certain relationships? What you have to realize if you are dating someone like this is that it has absolutely nothing to do with you! The person could be unhappy in their own life, perhaps is in a bad place and maybe has self-esteem issues. It's hard to see it at the time, and any man or woman who has dated in their life will tell you that we have all tried to be the fixer at one time or another in a relationship.
You can't fix the hot and cold person. Accept it and get out of the relationship. A deep, meaningful relationship is one that is hot and hot. It consists of feeling warmth and of feeling loved and cherished all the time — not just sometimes.
Why Men Go Hot and Cold & 5 Things You Need to Do
It is the best feeling in the world. Looking back at the hot and cold guy, I don't feel animosity toward him because I think I was an enabler for awhile, letting him treat me hot and cold. I also feel sorry for him because I don't think he is capable of the kind of emotional intimacy I want in a romantic relationship.
And lastly, I feel lucky I had the strength and courage and wisdom to realize I needed to get out of such a toxic situation. Dating someone who is hot and cold can never turn into a healthy romantic relationship. On the contrary, it ends in freezer burn!