Exactly What To Say In A First Message – The OkCupid Blog
" Girls get so many bad first messages in online dating. We're dying to get a message so good it knocks us over. Here's how to do it." Read More ›. Here are some online dating message tips to help you write something that Commenting on someone's online dating profile shows that you After all, isn't that what you signed up for when you joined an online dating site?. Wondering what to say in your first online dating message? Tired of not getting responses to the messages you send on online dating sites and apps?.
You get the idea… Next, skim through her profile. Also take note of things you have in common. If you ask about something you are mutually interested in, you'll have a much easier time keeping the conversation flowing. No time to read through the profiles of all the attractive women you want to message?
11 Online Dating First Message Examples That Get Responses
Keep reading for some examples. Or take the most efficient route of all, and let us do it all for you. Your message needs to grab her attention, pique her curiosity, and make her want to know more about you.
You also want to make it easy for her to respond, and the best way to do that is to ask her a question. First of all, you need to come to the table with a conversation topic.
A thought provoking, fun, playful message that stands out from all the lame messages cluttering up her inbox. This is where the intel you gathered comes in. Use the advanced search criteria to find women who like to ski, then send that message to any of them who interest you.
This works for any keyword, like travel: Here's a conversation starter that's almost sure to get a response if her dog makes an appearance in her profile or photos: You can send an icebreaker like this one to just about any woman, as who doesn't like to think they've got a well-developed sense of adventure?: This message also has copy and paste potential, because thinking about dessert is popular across the board: Once you come up with a few good copy and paste messages, test them out and keep the winners.
Make it easy for her to respond by asking a question in your message.
Base your question on information that you gathered from her profile. Use proper grammar and correct spelling — you only get one first impression. Ask her out in the first message, she wants to get to know you before meeting you in person. On a dating app like Tinder or Bumble, you can take a quick glance at her photos and bio to see if any common interests jump out. For instance if you find you both love dogs, you could send a message like this: First Message Strategy 3: Inspire A Craving Note: Certain words are attention grabbing because they sound delicious.
Notice how it starts off with a light compliment. Complimenting her will often give you points, but only if you focus on intangible qualities like intelligence or her accomplishments.
Paying her a more meaningful compliment is a breath of fresh air for her. Mentioning something yummy-sounding works just as well on dating apps.
How To Start An Online Dating Conversation
First Message Strategy 4: In fact, it literally stimulates your brain and makes you feel good. And the better she feels about talking to you, the more likely she is to share her number. The example above is more suited for a dating site where longer messages are the norm, but you can get her talking about herself on a dating app with a short message like this: First Message Strategy 5: They instantly pique her curiosity.
They set you apart from the crowd. They ask her a question.
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You need to make it as easy as possible for her to respond, and controlling the conversation is a simple way to do it. Those three elements are crucial if you want to get a response to your online dating opener.
How To Start An Online Dating Conversation
Weekday evenings are generally best — many women unwind from a long day at work by firing up a dating app while catching up on Netflix.
According to Nielsenactivity on both OkCupid and Tinder peaks at 9 pm, and usage starts to rapidly decline after 10 pm. On Bumble, the real action starts a little earlier, with activity peaking at 6 pm. And if you happen to find yourself stuck inside due to inclement weather like a blizzard, hurricane or rainstorm, put these first message examples to good use.
NBC News did a little investigating, and found that bad weather goes hand in hand with increased activity on dating sites and apps.Learn How Zoosk Works
In many cases, the increase was pretty dramatic. Send her a light-hearted follow up message like this one: